Jim Frankenfield - Humor Pages

[Home] - Get me out of here

Disclaimer - I did not write any of the humor in this archive, all of it came via email over the last 20+ years. I post it here for you amusement. Some may be political, some you may not find very funny. Don't blame me! And if it is political do not assume I agree or disagree with the viewpoint. I just thought it was amusing.


Cows (Somebody had a slow day at work!)



            --==>>  THE COMPLETE GUIDE TO COWS  <<==--

                 as you've NEVER seen them before!



-  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -  -



         (__)             (__)             (__)             (__)

         (oo)             (oo)             (oo)             (oo)

  /-------\/       /-------\/       /-------\/       /-------\/

 / |     ||       / |     ||       / |     ||       / |     ||

*  ||----||      *  ||W---||      *  ||w---||      *  ||V---||

   ~~    ~~         ~~    ~~         ~~    ~~         ~~    ~~

     Cow           Cow laden        Same cow       Betty Ford-type

                   with milk     after milking     cow with milk



         (___)             (___)    *        (___)             (___)

         (o o)             (o o)     \       (o o)             (o o)

  /-------\ /       /-------\ /       \-------\ /       /-------\ /

 / |     ||O       / |     ||O         |     ||O       / | ~#>-+|O

*  ||,---||       *  ||@\--||          ||,---||       *  ||,----|

   ~~    ~~          ~~    ~~          ~~    ~~          ~~     ~

     Bull       Same bull after    Rotc bull after    Red-blooded American Bull

                seeing above cow   seeing other bull   shooting the Rotc bull



         (__)             (__)             (__)             (__)

         (oo)             (oo)             (oo)             (oo)

  /-------\/-*     /-------\/       /-------\/   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 / |     || \     )*)(\/* /  *     / |     ||

*  ||----||  *   \ |||/)|/()(    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

\/|(/)(/\/(,,/   \)|(/\/|)(/\

  Cow munching   Grass munching   Cow in water       Cow in trouble

    on grass         on cow



          (__)             (__)    *        (__) *      (__)

          (oo)             (oo)     \       (oo) |      (oo)

  /--------\/      /-oooooo-\/       \-------\/  \-------\/

 * o|     ||      * ooooooooo     o  o|     ||   /     ||

    ||----||     ooooooooooooo        ||----||>==/-----||

 ooo^^    ^^    ooooooooooooooooo     ^^    ^^         ^^

  Cow taking      Cow in deep         Cow getting the shit

    a shit            shit             kicked out of her



         (__)

         (oo)                       U

  /-------\/                    /---V

 / |     ||                    * |--|                       .

*  ||----||

   ^^    ^^

Cow at 1 meter.         Cow at 100 meters.        Cow at 10,000 meters.



         (__)                     )__(                vv    vv

         (oo)                     (oo)                ||----||  *

  /-------\/               *-------\/                 ||     | /

 / |     ||               / |     ||                 /\-------/

*  ||----||              /  ||----||                (oo)

   ^^    ^^                 vv    vv                (~~)



American Cow              Polish Cow            Australian Cow



         (__)                     (__)                     (__)

         (oo)                ____ (oo)                _---_(oo)

  /-------\/               /-    --\/               /-     -\/

 / |     ||               / |     ||               /|      ||

*  ||----||              *  ||___-||              *  ||___-||

   ^^    ^^                 ^^    ^^                 ^^    ^^



Freshman Cow at          Freshman Cow             Freshman Cow

start of school     After the "Freshman 15"    After the "Freshman 20"



         (__)                     (__)                     (__)

         (OO)                     (@@)                     (xx)

  /-------\/               /-------\/               /-------\/

 / |     ||               / |     ||               / |     ||

*  ||----||              *  ||----||              *  ||----||

   ^^    ^^                 ^^    ^^                 ^^    ^^



Cow who drank Jolt       Cow who ate              Cow who used Jolt to wash

                      psychadelic mushrooms      down psychadelic mushrooms



                                         /\                  __

                                        /  \                 ||

             (__)                 (__)  \  /               (_||_)

             SooS                 (oo)   \/                 (oo)

      /------S\/S          /-------\/    /S          /-------\/

     / |     ||           / |     ||    /  S        / |     ||

    *  ||----||          *  ||----||___/    S      *  ||----||

       ^^    ^^             ^^    ^^                  ^^    ^^

    This cow belonged     Ben Franklin owned       Abe Lincoln's

  to George Washington       this cow                   cow



                                                 (__)

         *        (__)                           (oo)

          \       (oo)                     /------\/

           \-------\/                     /|  |/  |

            | ==$ ||                     / |  [) ||

            ||----||                    *  ||----||

            ^^    ^^                       ^^    ^^

     Old "One Arm" belonged           This cow was given to

       to Ceasar's Palace           Hugh Hefner for his Birthday



                  (___)               (__)      (__)

                  ( O )               (oo)      (oo)

           /-------\ /                 \/--------\/

          / |     ||V                   |        |

         *  ||----||                    ||------||

            ^^    ^^                    ^^      ^^

  The cyclops that Jason and         This cow lived with

the Argonauts met had this cow          Dr. Doolittle



             (__)                   (__)

             [##]                   (@o)

      /-------\/             /-------\/              /-------  (__)

     / |     ||             / |     ||              / |     || (oo)

    *  ||----||            *  ||----||             *  ||----|---\/

       ^^    ^^               ^^    ^^                ^^    ^

 This cow belonged      This cow lived with      This cow belonged to

  to Flash Gordon       the Little Rascals       the Headless Horseman



                  (____)               (____)                         (____)

                  (oo  )               (o  o)                         ( O O)

       /-----------\  /          /-----\    /----          /-----------\  /

      / ||       |  \/          / |   |  \/   |           / ||       |  \/

     /  ||       ||||           \ |  |      | | |        /  ||       ||||

    *   ||||-----||||            *| | |-----| | |       *   ||||-----||||

        /\/\     /\/\             /\ /\     /\ /\           ^^^^     ^^^^

   This cow belonged         This was Salvatore      No one was sure whether

    to Pablo Picasso        Dali's favorite cow    M.C. Escher's cow had four

                                                         legs or eight



               O__O                            \_|_/

               (oo)                             (oo)

        /-------\/                       /-------\/

       / |     ||                       / |     ||

      *  ||----||                      *  ||----||

         ^^    ^^                         ^^    ^^

    Cow at Disneyland         Cow visiting the Statue of Liberty



                        (__)                        (__)

                ^^      (oo)                        (--)

            ^^^^ /-------\/                        /-\/-\

         ^^^^^  / |     ||                        /|    |\

       ^^^^^   *  ||----||                       ^ |    | ^

    ^^^^^^^^  ====^^====^^====                     |    |

^^^^^^^^^^^^^/                                     /----\

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^                                /    \ \

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^               ^      * ^

     Cow Hanging Ten at Malibu           Cow sunning at Fort Lauderdale

                                             (What a bod, huh guys?)



               )\               (__)

              /  \              (oo)

        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

           Cow swimming at Amityville

(Where Jaws was filmed, for those less educated)



        *                                                 (__)

         \                                                (DD)

          \                                        /-------\/

          |\                                      / |     ||_\_/

        \ | \ (__)                               *  ||----|

        \\|| \(oo)                                  ^^    ^

         \||\ \\/                         Cow chugging brews and staring at

          ^^ \||                            sunbathers at Fort Lauderdale

           \\ ||

            \\||

             \||

              ^^                                 / / / / / / / / / / /

               \\_                              / / / / / / / / / / / /

                \_                              / / / / / _______   / /

 Cow skiing a Black Diamond at Aspen            / / /    /   |   \  / /

                                                / / /    (__)|      / /

                                                / / /    (oo)|      / /

   ( @@@ )                                        /-------\/ |

    ( @@ )            (------------)             / |     ||^_|

       @@  (__)       (  *>COUGH<* )            *  ||----|

        @@ (oo) . . . (  *>COUGH<* )               ^^    ^

     /--UU--\/        (____________)

    / |    ||                             Cow sheltering from English Weather

   *  ||---||


   (New) Jersey Cow

                       O O                 O O

                        \ \               / /

                         \ \          (__) /

          (__)            \ \         (xx)/

          (DD)             \ +--------+\//

   /-------\/               \|        | /

  / |     ||                 +--------+

 *  ||----||

    ^^    ^^

Cow fantasizing about "Riding the Mechanical Bull"

            at Gillies in Texas



         o  o

         |__|               (__)             (__)

         (oo)               (oo)            =(oo)=         oo

  /-------\/         /-------vv       /-------\/

 / |     ||         / |     ||       / |     ||

*  ||----||        *  ||----||      *  ||----||

   ~~    ~~           ~~    ~~         ~~    ~~

bill bixby          bela lugosi      boris karloff  claude rains

male relative cow   cow              cow            cow



                       x

                   xxxx|xxxx

                xxxxxxx|xxxxxxx

                       |

                      //

                (__) //                        (__)   (__)

                (oo)//                         (oo)===(oo)

         /-------\//                    /-------\/     \/-------\

        / |     |//                    / |     ||       ||     | \

       *  ||----|                     *  ||----||       ||----||  *

          ^^    ^^                       ^^    ^^       ^^    ^^

     Julie Andrews Cow                         Siamese cows



                            o        o             (__)    ^

                             \      /              (oo)   /

                              \    /           _____\/___/

             (__)              \__/           /  /\ / /

             (oo)       _______(oo)          ^  /  * /

    /---------\/       /|  ___  \/             / ___/

   / | x=a(b)||       / | {   }||         *----/\

  *  ||------||      *  ||{___}||             /  \

     ^^      ^^         ||-----||            /   /

                        ^^     ^^           ^    ^



    Mathematical        Television      This cow does Disco

        Cow                 Cow        (That's what comes of

   (developer of        (Cow-thode      snorting cow-caine)

     cow-culus)          Ray Tube)



            o

            | [---]

            |   |

            |   |                              |------========|

       /----|---|\                             | **** |=======|

      /___/___\___\                         o  | **** |=======|

      |            |                     ___|  |==============|

      |           |                ___  {(__)} |==============|

      \-----------/             [](   )={(oo)} |==============|

       \  \   /  /             /---===--{ \/ } |

    -----------------         / | NASA  |====  |

    |               |        *  ||------||-----^

    -----------------           ||      |      |

      /    /  \   \             ^^      ^      |

     /     ----    \

      ^^         ^^           This cow jumped over the Moon



                (__)

               ([][])            "I have this recurring dream

               __\/_--U              about golden arches."..  (__)

              /\    \__                                 ^  :..("")

             /\\\  /  /                         //\  ____\_____\/ //

            /----^/__/\ /\                     // \\/     \___ / //

                \\\____/--\--                 // /-/__________/ //

                 /======   \/            =======/==============//

              *_/ /    \   /^              //  /              \\

                 /      \ ^               //                   \\



                     Psycowlogist and patient



                                               (___)

          \^^^^^^^^\   (__)                    (o o)

           \^^^^^^^^\\ (oo)                     \ /

        *-----\_______\/\/                    \--O--/

      ^_______/   ---  \______^              // -----\

     ^--------\   \S/  /\_____^              \\/_^{} /==V===[]

               \______/                        \_____\\//

                                                \__/

   It's a bird...                               //\\         The Boss

    It's a plane...                             //  \\   (Bruce Holstien)

                                                //   //

                                                ^^    ^^

                                          ==================

 _____________________________            H                H

 |             |-------------|            H     (__)       H

 |             |   ________  |            H     (oo)       H       __

 |   COWNTY    |  | (|__|) | |            H    / \/ \      H     /    \

 |    JAIL     |  |  |oo|  | |            H   | |  | |     H    | STOP |

 |             |  |__|\/|__| |            H   D===b=-----  H     \ __ /

 |             | o           |            H^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^H       ||

 |             | ^           |            H                H       ||

 |             | ]           |            H                H       ||

 |             |             |            H                H       ||

 |_____________|_____________|            H                H       ||

                                          ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^     ^^^^^^^

 Some cows get in trouble...                 Cattle Guard



     (  (    )

   ( (     )   )

   ( (         )

  (           / )

 ( ( \\       )

     ( |  // )

       |   |    (__)

       |   |    (oo)                   (__)

       |   | ----\/              ______(oo)_____

       |   |    ||              ( _)_______(__) )

     **|   | ---||                \ __________/

    ``'---------^^

        Cow Hide                     Cow Pie



                   \  |  /         ___________

    ____________  \ \_# /         |  ___      |       _________

   |            |  \  #/          | |   |     |      | = = = = |

   | |   |   |  |   \\#           | |`v'|     |      |         |

   |            |    \#  //       |  --- ___  |      | |  || | |

   | |   |   |  |     #_//        |     |   | |      |         |

   |            |  \\ #_/_______  |     |   | |      | |  || | |

   | |   |   |  |   \\# /_____/ \ |      ---  |      |         |

   |            |    \# |+ ++|  | |  |^^^^^^| |      | |  || | |

   |            |    \# |+ ++|  | |  |^^^^^^| |      | |  || | |

^^^|    (^^^^^) |^^^^^#^| H  |_ |^|  | |||| | |^^^^^^|         |

   |    ( ||| ) |     # ^^^^^^    |  | |||| | |      | ||||||| |

   ^^^^^^^^^^^^^________/  /_____ |  | |||| | |      | ||||||| |

        `v'-                      ^^^^^^^^^^^^^      | ||||||| |

         || |`.      (__)    (__)                          ( )

                     (oo)    (oo)                       /---V

              /-------\/      \/ --------\             * |  |

             / |     ||        ||_______| \

            *  ||W---||        ||      ||  *

               ^^    ^^        ^^      ^^

                        "Cow Town"

              \ (__)                       (__)

              \\(oo)                       (\/)

         /-----\\\/                 /-------\/

        / |    (##)                / |     ||

       *  ||----||"               *  ||----||

          ^^    ^^                   ~~    ~~

    This cow plays bagpipes.      Cow from Beijing



         (__)                     (__)                     (__)

         (\/)                     ($$)                     (**)

  /-------\/               /-------\/               /-------\/

 / | 666 ||               / |=====||               / |     ||

*  ||----||              *  ||----||              *  ||----||

   ^^    ^^                 ^^    ^^                 ^^    ^^



Satanic cow           This cow is a Yuppie         Cow in love



         (__)                                              (__)

         (oo)                                              (oo)

  /-'''''-\/                            /-------------------\/

 / |'''''||                            / |                 ||

*  ||''''||                           *  ||----------------||

   ^^    ^^                              ^^                ^^

 Cow in Argyle                                Stretch Cow

                        *

                      **   **

                 * **  * * *  **

                *   /  /   \ *  *

             \  \ /  \        / /                         (__)

          *  /  / \  \  (__)  \ \                /--------(00)

            /           (00)  / /               / |      |(  )

            \    /-------\/   \ \              *  ||---- ||()

            /   / |     ||    / /                 ||     ||

          \ \  *  ||----||    \ \                 ^^     ^^

         /  /     ^^    ^^    / /            Cow Chewing Marbles

                 Cow in Heat



              \ (__)                                          (__)

              \\(oo)                                 /--------(00)

         /-----\\\/                                 / |      |(  )

        / |    (##)                                *  ||---- ||()

       *  ||----||"                                   ||     ||

          ~~    ~~                                    ~~     ~~

    This cow plays bagpipes.                     Cow Chewing Marbles



          (___)

          (o o)

    /------\ /   (__)

   /    ____O    (oo)

  |   / /----\----\/        "Where did that camera come from!"

  /\oo===|  /    ||

 | ||   *||~-----||

 *  ~~   ~~      ~~



         (__)                 \__\                 (__)

         (oo)             o   (oo)                 (oo)

  /-------\/           ____\___\/          *+-------\/

 / |     ||           / |     ||           ||______||

*  ||----||          *  ||----||             ||----||

   OO    OO             OO    OO             OO    OO

Detroit cow          Mustang cow            pickup cow



                 (__)              (__)              \_||_~

                 (oo)              (oo)              (*||*)

  /---------------\/           /----\/        /-------\||/

 / |             ||           /    ||        / |     ||

*  ||------------||        *-||----||       *  ||----||

   OO            OO          OO    OO          OO    }{

      li-moo-cow          fastback cow      teenager's cow



         ____

        (____)

                               .xxxx.

         (__)                  '(oo)`

         (oo)            /-----'-\/ `

  /-------\/            / |    |============>

 / |     ||            *  ||----| (~)

*  ||----||               ~~    ~

   ~~    ~~             Moo-ammar Cowdafi

   holy cow            armed and dangerous



         (___)             (___)

         (o o)             (o o)

  /-------\ /       /-------\ /

 / |     ||O       / |  O~ ||O

*  ||,---||       *  ||,---||

   ^^    ^^          ^^    ^^

    A Bull       A-bomb-in-a-bull     No-bull



           (---)

           (   )

          /-----\                          (___)

          |     |                          (o o)

          |  |  |                   (-----) \ /

          |  |  |                  /  / \    O

          |  *  |                 *  | O |

          ^^   ^^                    -----

          Coward                  Phone Bull





 |    |                              |    |           *

 |    |            (__)              |    |            \       (__)

 |    |            (oo)              |    |             \      (oo)

 |    |     /-------\/               |    |          -----------\/--

 |    |    / |     ||                |    |          ----|      |---

 |    |   *  ||----||                |    |              --------

 |    \______^^____^^___             |    \_________________

 |     _________________             |     _________________

 |    /                              |    /

 |    |                              |    |

 |    |                              |    |

 |    |                              |    |

 |    |                              |    |

 |    |                              |    |

 |    |                              |    |

 |    |                              |    |

/      \                            /      \



Cow perched on a tree.              Cow attempting to fly off tree.



 |    |

 |    |

 |    |

 |    |

 |    |

 |    \_________________

 |     _________________

 |    /

 |    |

 |    |

 |    |

 |    |

 |    |

 |    |                                (__)

 |    |                      *---------(..)

/      \                        ^^----^^\/



Cow that has failed miserably in the attempt.

                 

                  ________________________

         (__)    /                        \

         (oo)   (  Meet our great leader!  )

  /-------\/  --'\________________________/

 / |     ||

*  ||----||

   ~~    ~~

                                                   #            #

                                                  ##            ##

                                                 ##              ##

                                                ##                ##

                                                ##                ##

                                                ###              ###

        M     M    OOOO     OOOO                 ###   ######   ###

        MM   MM   O    O   O    O                #######    #######

        M M M M   O    O   O    O               #                  #

        M  M  M   O    O   O    O              #    ###      ###    #

        M     M   O    O   O    O             #    #   #    #   #    #

        M     M    OOOO     OOOO              #    # ###    # ###    #

                                   \\         #     ###      ###     #

                                    \\         #                    #

                                     \\________ #     ########     #

                                      \--------  #   # ##  ## #   #

                                                  #  #        #  #

                                         #########  # # #### # #

                                   ######              ######   ####

        ###########################                                ###

      ##                                                             ##

    ##                                     #                          #

   #  ##                                   #                          #

  #  # #                                    #       #         #       #

  # #  #                                    #      #           #      #

  # #   #               #                    #     #           #     #

  # #    #              #                    #    #             #    #

  # #     #            #                     #    #             #    #

  # #      #          #                      #    #          ####    #

  # #       #        #####                    #  #        ###    #  #

  # #        #      #   # #####################  #########       #  #

  # #       #      #   #                      #  #               #  #

  # #      #      #   #                       #  #               #  #

 #   #      #    #   #                        #  #               #  #

  # #        #   #   #                        #  #               #  #

   #          #   #   #                       #  #               #  #

               ##### ###                      ####               ####

                ###### ###                   ######             ######





  .            /\         .       .        :                (__)

        .     /  \      .          .       :                (xx)

             /    \   .        .    *      :         __------\/

            /      \              *        :        * ||____||

            | (__) |   .    .   **         :         / |    |\

     .     /| (oo) |\           **         :

          / | /\/\ | \   .     . *         :         Hamburger

      .  /  |=|==|=|  \     .      *       :

     . /    | |  | |    \  .               :

      / USA | ^||^ |NASA \     .           :       *        (__)

     |______|  ^^  |______|       .        :        \       (oo)

    .       (__||__)     .   .             :         \-------\/

       .    /_\  /_\  .     .    .         :        8-|     ||

            !!!  !!!                       :          ||----||

                                           :          ^^    ^^

  The cow that jumped over the moon.       :         Flying Cow



                          ...---...

                       ../  / | \  \..

                     ./ /  /  |  \  \ \.

                    /  /   /  |  \   \  \

                   /  /   /   |   \   \  \

                   ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

                   \          |          /

                    \         |         /

                     \        |        /

                      \       |       /

                       \      |      /

                        \     |     /

                         \    |    /

                          \   |   /

                           \  |  /

                            \ | /(__)

                             \|/ (oo)

                          /---++--\/

                         / |  || ||

                        *  ||-++-||

                           ^^    ^^

               Cow surviving attack by Red Baron



              ..---..                             (__)

             /       \                            (oo)

             |  RIP  |                     /-------\/

             |       |                    / |     ||

             |       |                   *  ||----||

             |       |                      ^^    ^^

\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\/////////////////



            Elvis's Cow...      ...Or is it alive and living in tax exile???



                     (__)

                     (oo)

        /---+      +--\/

       / |  |      | ||

      *  ||-+      +-||

         ^^          ^^                             *



   David Copperfield's Cow               David Copperfield's other Cow



                                    (__)

                                    (oo)

                             /-------\/

                            / |     ||

                           *  ||----||

                              ^^    ^^

                             (__)  (__)

                             (oo)  (oo)

                      /-------\/    \/-------\

                     / |     || -^^- ||     | \

                    *  ||----   -^^-       ||  *

                       ^^                  ^^

                      (__)                (__)

                      (oo)                (oo)

               /-------\/                  \/-------\

              / |     ||                    ||     | \

             *  ||----||                    ||----||  *

                ^^    ^^                    ^^    ^^

                 Barnum's Troupe of performing cows



                    (__)                       _--------_

                    (oo)                      |__________|   BIG

             /-------\/                        XXXXXXXXXX    MAC

            / | 007 ||                         __________

           *  ||----||                        |_        _|

              ^^    ^^                          --------

       Cow licenced to kill      Enemy Cow after having met previous cow



                                                     (__)

                                                     (oo)

                                                    /'^^^-m

            (__)                                   / '' ` )

            (oo)    o     /| /|/|_                |      /|

           / \/    /    /      _ /                |  |  | |

          /  _\===^   ___\_____/___               |_____|_|

      ___|__/ |/\    (___________(_)               //|| ||

     *        ^ ^                                 *  ww ww



            Mrs. O'Leary's Cow                 Cow'nt Dracula



 ____             ____                                |+++++|

|++++|    ___    |++++|                       ____    |+++++|

|++++|   |++ ______________________          |++++|   |+++++|

|++++|   |++/      /( )\           \         |++++|   |+++++|   __

|    |   |+|      |-oo- |           \______  |++++|   |+++++|  |++|

-----(__)--|       \__\/           _(__)_  \ --------------------------------

 o   ( oo /_______________________| (oo)  \ |         __

 |  _/\_| |  M O O - B U S T E R S|__\/\ /| |        /oo| - Bleaurgh!

 |-|  \\____                         ------  )_    /|  /\

  -|_  \_|-_|^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 0     _|  *  \/  *

     \  |  __________________________________/

     |  W|  \ \_/ /----------------- \ \_/ /

     / /\ \  \___/                    \___/

    / /  \ \

    ^^^   ^^^                                      Who you gonna call...?



        (__)                   (__)                   (__)       (----------)

        (00)                   (-o)                   (--) . . . ( *>YAWN<* )

  /------\/              /------\/              /------\/        (----------)

 /|     ||              /|     ||              /|     ||

* ||----||             * ||----||             * ||----||


Cow w/ Glasses   Flirtatious cow (winking)   Cow after pulling an all-nighter



*        (__)              (__)               (__)               (__)

 \       (oo)              (oo)               (oo)               (oo)

  \-------\/        /-------\/         /-------\/         /-------\/

  /|      |\       / /      \         / \      /         / \      \

 //||----||\\     * //------\\       *   \\--//         *   \\----\\

 ^ ^^    ^^ ^       ^        ^            ^  ^               ^     ^

Cow walking         Cow jogging         Same cow        Cow breaking



          (__)

          (oo)                       (__) o       *     (__)

           \/                        (oo)/ "      |     (oo)

       ____| \____            /-------\/(__ o=o=o=|------\/

       ---/   --**           / |       /          |      |

    *____/    |___//        *  ||----||           ||----||

        //--------/            ^^    ^^           ^^    ^^

       //__                      Cow           Cow pooing

       Cow marching            standing



   Side      Front   Side   back                (___)  Where's all the bulls!

   (__)      (__)    (__)   (__)                (O O)/

   ( oo      (oo)    oo )   (  )            ^  _/\ /\_  ^

   /\_|      /\/\    |_/\   /  \            \\/   O   \//







         (__)                       |    |                   (__)

         (oo)                       |    |                   ($$)

      ----\/                  /-----~~~~~~            /-------\/

         ||                  / |     ||              / | IRS ||

      ---||                 *  ||----||             *  ||----||

         ~~                    ~~    ~~                ~~    ~~

 Eric the half a cow     The unknown cowmic         Tax Acowntant





          (___)            (___)             (___)

          (0 0)            (0 0)             (0 0)

           \ /              \ /               \ /

        __[_V_]__        __[_V_]__         __[_V_]__

       /_________\===:  /_________\===:   /_________\===:

       \OOO---OOO/      \OOO---OOO/       \OOO---OOO/



                        Cowed Forces

             \ _ /

            - ( ) -                          /\

             / " \                         /|  |   (__)

             (__)                        /  |  |   (oo)\

     ________(oo)                      /____|  |    \/|  \

    /|        \/                     /       \/       |    \

   / |_______||                   __(_______          |||__  \

  *  ||      ||                  |__________|         |||  ____\---*

     ~~      ~~

 Thomas Edison's cow               Cow hearing his master's voice





           )    (                        _

           (____)                       / \                (__)   ==========I

          / =  = \    ~              =='   `==             (oo)    \ |||||| I

          (-O--O-)    ~               8 O O 8       /-------\/      \ ||||| I

           (    )     ~       /------- (   )       / |     ||__o=<   \ |||| I

  /------- ||||||======      / |     || \_/       *  ||----|          \ ||| I

 / |     ||  \/             *  ||----||              ~~    ~           \ || I

*  ||----||                    ~~    ~~

   ~~    ~~             

   Groucho Moo-x                Chico                Harpo



      ______________________            _______________________

      |                    |            |                     |

      |            (__)    |            |  (__)               |

      |            (oo)    |            |  (oo)               |

      |     /-------\/     |            |---\/           /----|

      |    / |     ||      |            |  ||           / |   |

      |   *  ||----||      |            |--||          *  ||--|

      |      ~~    ~~      |            |  ~~             ~~  |

      |--------------------|            |---------------------|

            Normal Cow                  0   Cow  modulo one   1



                  (__)                                   (__)

                  (oo)                                   (oo)

     ______________\/______               ____    /-------\/  __

    /___/___/___/___/___/_/|             /___/|  / |     || _/_/|

    |___|___|___|___|___|_||             |__||/|* //-----|||_|_||

    |_|___|___|___|___|___||             |_|__|/|~~      ~/|___||

    |___|___|___|___|___|_|/             |___|_|/        |___|_|/



    Cow in the GDR before...             ...and after 9-Nov-1989



       ______________(__)_________________                      (__)

     /_______________(oo)_______________ /                      (oo)

     |                \/                ||                       \/

    _|_                                _||                       ||

   /__/_______________________________/__/|                      ||

  (   )                              (   )|                      ||

   | |________________________________| | |                      ||

   \_____________________________________/]              /------- /

    []               []               []                / |     ||

                                                       *  ||----||

                    COW-CH                                ~~    ~~

                                                          Cowraffe



                                              *      *

                                               \    /

                                                \  /

       /~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~\                 \/

     /   (__)                   \           +----------+

    |    (oo) ~~~~~~~~~~~\       |          |          |

   |~~~|  \/. \\       // \_* |~~~|         |          |

   |   |-----`//`====='\\-----|   |         |          |

   |   |-----//---------||----|   |         |          |

   |   |_ _ _"_ _ _ _ _ "_ _ _|   |         +----------+

    ~||~                      ~||~           ||      ||



                         "COWCH POTATO"

                                                 +------------+         +

                                                 | B A T E S  |  (__)   o

                       |    (0x)   (       )     |C O R R A L |  (**)  /|

----------             |     \/    (       )     +------------+  \==/ / |

|\         \                        W------       |          |   (  )   v

|  ----------          *----   ====;                            (    )

|  |  (__)  |           \           /                           (    )

\  |  (oo)  |            \          |                           (    )

 \ |   \/   |              \+       |                           (    )

   ----------                       +                           (    )

    Ice Cowbe            COWBOOOOOM!                             |  |

                                                                 o  o

                                                    Psycho Cow (with knife)

         (__)

         (oo)   -------------------------          _______________________

  /-------\/ - | Don't have a Bart, man! |        |\ ~                ~  /|

 / |     ||     -------------------------         | \    ~      ~     ~ / |

*  ||----||                                       |(_\ ~   COW-PIE ~   /_)|

   ~~    ~~                                       |(oo\   ~           /oo)|

 The Simpsons' cow                                | \/ \       ~  ~  / \/ |

                                                  |(__) \           / (__)|

                \               /                 \(oo)(_\ ~     ~ /_)(oo)|

                 \_____________/                   \\/ (oo\       /oo) \//

                 /\___________/\                    \   \/ \  ~  / \/   /

      Cow in    / /\_________/\ \                    \  (__)\   / (__) /

      trouble  / / /\_______/\ \ \                    \ (oo) \~/  (oo)/

              / / / / (__) /\ \ \ \                    \ \/   :(__)\//

          ___/_/_/_/_ (oo) \_\_\_\_\___                 \ (__):(oo) /

             \ \ \ \ \ \/  / / / / /                     \(oo): \/ /

              \ \ \ \/_____\/ / / /                       \\/(__) /

               \ \ \/_______\/ / /                         \ (oo)/

                \ \/_________\/ /                           \ \//

                 \/___________\/                             \:/

                 /             \

                /               \



          (__)               (__)              (______)             (__)

          (oo)               (oo)              ( o  o )             (oo)

  /--------\/         /~~~~~~~\/          /-----\    /       /-------\/

./ |        |       ./ {~)))))_}         / |     |\/        / |     ||

   |--W-----|          ||``   ||        *  ||----||        *  (.)(.)||

   | |    | |          ~~     ~~           ~~    ~~           ~~    ~~

   ~~    ~~

cow before weight       cow after          Conceited       Dolly Parton's

  loss program         the program            Cow               Cow



                              (___)

                              (  OO

  ______      ______      _____\_ |                 ______  (__) ______

 |      |    |      |    |      |\O    cowstle     |      | (oo)|      |

 |      |____|      |____|      |                  |      |__\/_|      |

 |                              |                  |                   |

 |                              |   (__)           |                   |

 |          __________          |   (oo)           |     __________    |

 |         |          |         |    \/-------\    |    |          |   |

 |         |          |         | ___ | ___  |_\_  |    |          |   |

 |         |   (__)   |         |_| |_|_| |__|| |__|    |   (__)   |   |

 |         |   (oo)   |                                 |   (oo)   |   |

 |          \___\/___/                                   \___\/___/    |

 |                                                                     |

 |                                                                     |

  (                                    ______                         )

   (                                  /      \                       )

     (                               /        \                    )

        (                            |        |                 )

           |                         |        |              |

           |                         |        |              |

           |_________________________|________|______________|

  \ \

   \ \

    \ \

     \ \   (__)

      \ \  (oo)                                                 /

   /---\----\/                                                 /

  / |   \  ||                               *         (__)    /

 *  ||---\-\\                                \        ( OO   /

    ~~      ~~                                \---\___/\_|\=/>

            ~~       ~~                       |        \===/>

             \\_____//                        | /______/  /

             ||     |                 _________\\_\\_____/__________________

             /\------\                          ~  ~    /

            (oo)      \                                /

            (--)       *                              /



Cow Circus: The flying Cowlendas         Cow Circus: Tightrope walking



          ______________________

         |                      |\

         |       (__)           | |

         |       (oo)           | |

         |        \/            | |

         |       / \ \          | |

        /////////   \_ \_///////  |

         |     |     /          | |                           (__)

         |   /++++++<           | |                      _____(oo)

         |==/====|==\=\=========|=|===========================\\/

         | *     |    \_\_      | |                   / |     ||

   _______O)-----~---------------\O)_________________*__||----||_____



                cow-lliope in the circus parade

      *

       \

    w   \    w                                        (__)

    \\  /\  //                                        (oo)

     \\/  \//                                          \/

      |    |                    (__)               >--(  )--<

      |(__)|                    (oo)                  /  \

      \(OO)/                   .-\/-.             >--- {} ---<

      //\/\\                  <|    |>              v  /\  v

      ||  ||                   \ \/ /               | (oo) |

      ||__||                   |\/\/|                \(~~)/

     /~~  ~~\                  /----\                 |  |

   / ======== \               /      \                |  |

  /            \              /* * * \               / \/ \

 |==============|            /__*_*_*_\              |  \ |

  \            /               ||  ||                ~  / ~

   \ ======== /                ~~  ~~                  *

     \ _____ /

Cow balancing on ball          Cowslip            Cownilingus



             (__)                                         -'`-       "Here's

             (oo)     ____________________                ( oo  ~     mooing

      /-------\/     |                    |               /\_|--      at you,

     / |     |\ /    |  o  o  o  o  o  o  |              | \ \__  _   kid!"

    *  ||----| /     ======================              |  \___['

       ~~    ~       ||                  ||              |    ||

       Cowncillor            his cowch                   |____|-

                                                          |  |

                                                          ~  ~

         (__)    (__)   (__)    (__)                 humphrey cow-gurt

         (oo)    (oo)   (oo)    (oo)

  /-------\/      \/     \/      \/-------\

 / |     ||  ===================  ||     | \

*  ||----||   || |--|   |--| ||   ||----||  *

   ~~    ~~   -- ~  ~   ~  ~ --   ~~    ~~            (__)

          A game of cowntract bridge                  (oo)

                                                     / \/       ____________

                                                    /   \===~__|            |

                ----------------------             _|___ /\  |______________|

          (__)  | \-/   \-/    ||    |            |=====| |   |            |

          (oo)  | _|_   _|_   |__|   |            *I   I| |   |            |

   /-------\/   ----------------------             I   I~ ~   |            |

  / |     ||    |   \-/  |   |    |  |

 *  ||----||    |   _|_ |_| |_|  |_| |            wolfgang amadeus moo-zart

    ~~    ~~    ----------------------

           Just a humble cownoisseur



    (__)  (__)   (__) (__)(__)    (__) (__)(__)(__)  (__)

    (oo(__)oo) (__)o) (oo)((__)(__)oo) (__)(o(__)o)(__)o)(__)

     \/(oo)\/  (oo)/(__)/  (oo)(oo)\/  (oo) \(oo)/ (oo)/ (oo)

        \/      \/  (oo)    \/  \/      \/    \/    \/    \/

                     \/

                         a cownfluence

                                                  _______

            (__(  .-<                            |   |   |

            (oo)  |                              |___|___|

          ___\/___|                              |\_____/|

         |  |  |                                 |       |

         |  |  |                                 |_______|

       >-'  |  |                             _   |   _   |

        *----/\                     /-------//   |--(_)--|

            /  \                   / |     ||    |_______|  (__)

           /    \                 *  ||----||    |       |  (++)

           ~     ~                   ~~    ~~    |_______|   \/

        Egyptian Cow                   Marie Antoinette's Cow

                 _

        ________|@|________

         |  POLICE  BOX  |                     __

         |---------------|                   (~\/~)              \(:)/

         |_______|     / |                    \oo/               (o|o)

         ||  |  ||    |  |               /-----\/           /-----\_/

         ||-----||    |  |              /|      |          /|      |

         ||__|__||    |  |             V ||----||         ~ ||----||

         |  ___  |    |  |               ~~    ~~           ~~    ~~

         | |___| |    |  |              Vulcan Cow         Klingon Cow

         | _____ |     (__)

         ||     ||     (oo)    ---------

         ||     ||----//\/ ---< Master? >

         ||     ||B-9  \ |     ---------

         ||_____||______\|

         |_______|_______|

                                                            ----------------

     a Certain Time Lord's Cow                 (__)     ---< EXTERMINATE!!! |

                                               ( ----0      ----------------

                  (___)                        _\/_

                  |===|                       /oooo\---O

           ________\_/                       /oooooo\

          | |        |                      /oooooooo\

          # ||______||                     /oooooooooo\

            ||      ||                    /____________\

            ~~      ~~

             RoboCow                        a Dalek Cow



   __________________        ___________________        ___________________

  /ine McBovine McBov\      /McCow McCow McCow M\      /ttle McCattle McCat\

 /cBovine McBovine McB\    /Cow McCow McCow McCow\    /e McCattle McCattle M\

------------------------  -------------------------  -------------------------

 \ovine McBovine McBov/    \McCow McCow McCow McC/    \attle McCattle McCatt/

  \McBovine McBovine /      \w McCow McCow McCow/      \ McCattle McCattle /

   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

                            Ronald McDonald's Cows



                           @ @

                            @@@ @

                              @@ @

               Pffii           @@@@ @@

         ___________D           @@@@@@

        |________  |            _______

         (__)   | /             \     /

         ( oo /~| |      __      \   /

         /\_|// | |     /  \     |  |

       _/____/__| |    |    |    |  |

      |       ___/-----------------_| (__)

      |      /   \     \     \       `(oo)

      |     /     \     |     |       |\/

      |    |   O  |    /     / __    /

      |----|      |-----------/  \-\\\                 (__)

           \     /           | o |  \\\               _(  )_

    ________\___/____________\__/____\\\_____________/_/__\_\____



                  Cow Express                     Suicidal Cow



                                              o         _____________

                                              /\       /             \

                                             [__]     ( take off, eh! )

     __  |   \ /                             (oo) ----'\_____________/

       \/----///\                     /-------\/

     */\______(xx)                   / |     ||__|

              (  )                  *  ||----|   U

                                       ~~    ~

Pro-democracy cow from Beijing         Canadian Cow



     o          o               o              o             o       o

o  o       o         o       o     o         o   o       o       o

    o   o      o       o       (    )      o    (    )        o  (    (    o

          O                     )  (             )  (             )  (

o  o     (__)     o     o       (__)        o    (__)     o   o   (__)

         (oo)                   (oo)             (oo)      o      (oo)     o

  /------$$$$   o   o    /-------\/  o    /-------\/       /-------\/

 / |     $$$$           / |     ||       / |     ||       / |     ||

*  ||----||        o   *  ||----||      *  ||----||      *  ||----||   o

   ~~    ~~               ~~    ~~         ~~    ~~         ~~    ~~

   Santa Cow and his rein cows caught in a Montana snow flurry

                                        ___

                                      _/...\  *==\        ________________

      __________ (___)               /::::::\  (/_\)     /                \

     /|         `(0 0)               |:::::::_ (o o)     |  Moo, Moo, Moo |

    / |           \ /              /-----+-+--- \ /     /\________________/

   *  |||----|||-/ *              / |    | |   | 0  ___/

      |||    |||                 *  | _  |_| _ |

                                    || --+_+- ||

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Cow           --        --

                                   |  |_     |  |_

          /\                       |____|    |____|

         / O\                         Santa Cows

        / ,  \

       /  O   \                                     _ - ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ - _

       -/ ,  \-                                   /          |~      |~    \

       /  O   \                                  |      |~  o|   |~ o|      |

      /,    ,  \                               /  \    o|       o|         /

     / O    O   \                            /      \                    /

     -/  ,     \-                           /        / ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

     /   O   ,  \                          /        /          .

    /  ,     O  ,\  (__)               /*     *\   /         ./\.

   /   O   ,    O \ (oo)              /\       /\           .//.\.

  /        O       \-\/              ****     ****         .///\\\.

  ------------------||               (oo)     (oo)         ////\\\\.

          ||/ ||----||        /-------\/       \/-------\     ||

          ||  ~~    ~~       /|      ||         ||      |\    ~~

  Merry Cow-ristmas         *  ||----||         ||----||  *

                               ~~    ~~         ~~    ~~

                                    Christmas Cowols



                               O

                                   O  O  O

                                            O                    *

           Moory Cowristmas!                 ___                /|\

                        _____________________|  |_____         /||o\

                       /______________________________\       /|o|||\

     ~                /________________________________\     /|||||o|\

      ~~  ####          ||   |   ||||||||||||   |   ||      /||o||||||\

         ~(oo)          ||___|___||||||||||||___|___||     /||||o||||||\

   /-------\/           ||   |   ||||||||||||   |   ||    /|o||||o|||o||\

  / |     ||            ||___|___||||||||||||___|__ ||          | |

 *  ||----||            ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||oooooooooo| |ooooooo

oooo~~oooo~~oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo





  |----------------------|                         /\

  |                      |                  /\  /\/  \

  |                      |                 /  \/ /    \/\

  |                      |                /            \ \

  |                      |          ----------------------------

  |______________________|

                                              \/

  |----------------------|                  o-@@

  |______________________|

                                       Minimalist Dead Cow

   ----------------------

      Mark Rothko Cow

                                                    /=`=~~~#&@~@&)|||><<><><>

                                                    \|}}{}{}{() (&)  ~~~~#***

  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |    #\**~~//?<>.+|@@@\/---___

  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |    \|}}{}{/?<>.+|@@*&(*$@))(

  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |    |@#)@(&*)($*I!?$>@$|$|$|$

------------------------------------------------

  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |       Jackson Pollock cow

  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |

  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |         ____________________

------------------------------------------------         |           (__)   |

  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |         |           (oo)   |

  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |         |    /-------\/    |

  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |         |   / |     ||     |

------------------------------------------------         |  *  ||----||     |

  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |  (__) |         |     ~~    ~~     |

  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |  ( oo |         | Ceci N'est Pas   |

  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |  /\_| |         |    Une Cow       |

------------------------------------------------         --------------------

              Andy Warhol Cow                             Rene Margritte Cow





            oo                    --

                                                           \/





       cow by night       sleeping cow by night        Chesire Cow





                     II

      ( MOOOOOO ! )  II\

  ________\   /      II +    (__) ..oo( Hey, there's a cow driving that car! )

 |\        `v' \      + II   (00)

 | \________|____\     \II\   \/-------\

 | (     ( @ @ )  )     II +    ||    ||\      (__) ..oo ( How can he     )

 |\|______\_O_/___|      + II   ||----|| *     (oo)        ( afford that? )

 | \_______________\      \II\  ~~    ~~        \/--------\

 \ (OO_##########_OO)      II +                    ||    || \

 (\(_____[PHIL]_____)       + II--+--+--+-II-+--+--+--II+--+--+--+II--+--+-

     (_)        (_)          \II          II       ~~ II ~~       II

                              II--+--+--+-II-+--+--+--II+--+--+--+II--+--+-



               What cows think when people MOO at them



           /\\   ~                 (__)                          (__)

          /__\\  |                 ( oo  _                       (oo)

     _    (o o)  |                 /\__|( ) _                   /-\/-\

    / \   /\_/\ /                 |  \==//=(_)  *POW!*         /      \

      | /|I   I|                  | ====                       |      |

      ~/ |I   I|                  |    |                       |      |

      |  |I   I|                 /|  _ \                      /        \

      |  |I   I|               /  / / \ \                     __________\

      |  |_____|             *    ||   ||                          \\

          ~  *~                   ||_  ||_                         (_)



cow giving forgiveness         Moo-hamid Ali                   Cow Bell.



            (!!)                        _/\_                       \_\

    !!!!!!!!(oo)                 _______(oo)              _________(oo)

   !/|       \/                 /|       \/              /| Ferrari \/

  !/ |______||                 / |______||              / |________||

  *  ||     ||                *  ||     ||             *  ||       ||

     ~~     ~~                   ~~     ~~                ~~       ~~

Last of the Moo-hicans        Mayflower cows             Sports Cow



                            (__)                            (__)

                            (oo)                            (oo)

            /--------------- \/              / ------------- \/

          / ( !S M T W T F! )               / (   |7 8 9 +|  )

        /  (  +-+-+-+-+-+-+  )             *  (   |4 5 6 -|  )

       *   (  +-+-+-+-+-+-+  )                 (  |1 2 3 X|  )

            ( +-+-+-+-+-+-+ )                   ( |C 0 = /| )

             (+-+-+-+-+-+-+)                     ~---------~

              ||        ||                       ||       ||

              ||        ||                       ||       ||

              ~~        ~~                       ~~       ~~

              "COWLENDAR"                        "COWCULATOR"



   /\

  /  \         __                           ________   ------

 DOCTOR      _/__\_                           |__| |   |====|

  MOO/      /=(OO)                            (oo) *   |   v|

   \/    --/==-\/==\                   /-------\/      |~~ *|

      / |  \==||  \==\   ///          / |     ||       ------

     *  ||-|==||   \==\/==/          *  ||----||

        ~~ ///~~     \===/              ~~    ~~

       Gallifreyan Cow               Straight out of Cowllege



         (__)

         (oo)

  /-------\/                           #         #

 / |     ||                            \\       //

*  ||----||\                            \\     //

   ~~    ~~ \                            \ --- /

             \                           |     |

              |                          |     |

              |                          |     |

              |                          / \_/  \        (__)

              |                         //      \\    <--(xx)--#-

              |                        //        \\       /\

  ___________\|/___________

        Cow-a-flower                 Cow at butcher's party



         ___--------___             ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        / .    .   .   \            ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   |\/   .    (__)    .  \/|        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~oo~~~~~~~~~~~~

   || .    .  (oo) .   .  ||        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

   |/\   .     \/    .   /\|        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

       \___ .    .  ___/            ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

           ---------                ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

                                    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        Cow in a haggis                   Cow on top of Ben Nevis


        ___________________________

       | (__)  (__)  (__)   (__)  |                   *        (__)

       | ( oo  ( oo  ( oo   ( oo  |                    \       (oo)

_______| /\_|  /\_|  /\_|   /\_|  |________             \-------\/

|                                         |              |     ||

|   _____                        _____    |              ||----||

|___|   |________________________|   |____|             (oo)  (oo)

    |___|                        |___|

              Cow-pooling                             rollerscating cow



                             __               o oo o

                            (__)               \||/

                            (__)               (__)              (___)

     (__)                   (oo)               (oo)              (o o)

     (  )            /-------\/         /-------\/        /$$$$$$$\ /

    ( /* )          / |     ||         / |     ||        / $$$$$$$|O

     |  |          *  ||----||        *  ||----||       *  ||w---||

     ~  ~             ~~    ~~           ~~    ~~          ~~    ~~

   Dairy-Air      East Indian Cow       Injun Cow          Cash Cow



                                                                    (       )

              (___)        PRISON#  #  #  #  #                       ||| |||

              (o o)        #  #  #  #  #(_#) #                       (O   O)

  /------------\ /         #  #  #  #  #(o#) #           /------------\___/

 / |           #-#         #  #/-#--#--#-\#  #          / |           |||

*  |         |||           #  # |#  #  #||#  #         /  ||          |||

   ||--------|||           # *# |#--#--#||#  #        *   ||----------|||

   ~~         ~~           #  # ~#  #  #~~#  #            ~~           ~~

  Orville Redencow                            The Bakker Cows





           (__)                                     (__)

         /   oo      ______                       /   @@      ______

        |  /\_|     |      \                     |  /\_|     |      \

        |  |___     |       |                    |  |___     |       |

        |   ---@    |_______|                    |   ---@    |_______|

     *  |  |   ----   |    |                     |  |   ----   |    |

      \ |  |_____                                |  |_____

       \|________|                         *____/|________|



             CompuCow                      CompuCow After an All-niter



             (__)                                   (__)

           /   --      ______                     /  .\/.     ______

          |  /\_|     |      \                   |  /\_|     |      \

          |  |___     |       |                  |  |___     |       |

          |   ---@    |_______|                  |   ---@    |_______|

          |  |   ----   |    |                *  |  |   ----   |    |

          |  |_____                            \ |  |_____

    *____/|________|                            \|________|



    CompuCow Asleep at the Keyboard       CompuCow Discovers Bug in Compiler



      \\                                    \\

       \\                                    \\

       / \                                   / \

      /   \                                 /   \

      \    \                                \    \

       \    \(__)                            \    \(__)

     *-->    (oo)                          *-->    (oo)

       /    / \/                           o /    / \/

      /    /                                /    /

      \   /                             o   \   /

       \ /                                   \ /

       //                                    //

      //                               o    //



  B-2 Stealth Bomber cow         Stealth cow on bombing run



  ___

 /   \       (    )   Happy

|     \       |--|    Mooosic!               (__)

|      |      \  /__                         (oo)

+----------+ __oo| \                  /      -\/                   (__)

|Steinway &|_  \/|  |                /       ||               >----(oo)---->

|___ Sons ___|_/ |__|               *  ------||             /-------\/

|   |        |   / /                   |     ~~            / |     ||

o   o        o  | |                    ||----             *  ||----||

                                       ~~                    ~~    ~~

 Chopin'ing Cow                        TeX cow            Steve Martin's cow





                      (__)                +=============================+

                      (oo)                |  F R E D ' S   S A L O O N  |

       ______    ______\/             (__)|          +-----+            |

    __|______\__/____/\\[}            (xx)|          | ___ |            |(__)

   /   ---             \\ ---          \/ |          |/=|=\|            |(oo)

|[]  /     \ \      /   /     \           |          |==|==|            | \/

    |   @   | \____/   |   @   |          |          |==|==|            |

     \     /            \     /       ------------------------------------

       ---                ---     

       COW-ASAKI                          Cows behind bars

                 __ _________                           __ _________

                (  V  _   _  )_                        (  V         )_

                /    ( \o/ )   )                       /     ////     )

               (      \_O_/    \                      (     (---)     \

                \      /O\      )                      \    |moo|      )

                 (    @   @    /                        (   (---)     /

                  (_____/\____)                          (_____/\____)

                       o                                      o

                      o                                      o

                    o                                      o

                (__)                                   (__)

           /----(uu)                              /----(uu)

       *__/|     \o==s                        *__/|     \o==s

/\(* \| __ \\----==s  \))              /\(* \| __ \\----==s  \))

     |/))*  | \   )*\||/))//                |/))*  | \   )*\||/))//

            ~  ~\/--\*)                            ~  ~\/--\*)

       Dreaming Cow                         Cow Dreaming of Silage



            (__)      o   o               *        (__)

            (oo)     o  o                  \       (OO)

     /-------\/==o  o                       \-------\/

    / |     ||  ____                    []   |     ||

   *  ||----||  |__|                   (/\)s==|----||

      ~~    ~~                         /__\   ~    ~~

  Cow blowing bubbles.             Cow kicking over lantern that started

                                     the Great Chicago Fire of 1885.



                __//     \__                                  |\__|\

        /~~~)~~/   )     (   \~~(~~~\                         | 00 |

       /(    _(  ~/       \~  )_    )\                   \---<( -- )>---/

      /  \ //  | /         \ |  \ /  \                    \    |--|    /

     /    \   O/           \O   //    \                    \__/    \--/

    (    )/\                   //\(    )                     (      )

    /\  //                         \  /\                     |      |

   / / /W          COW-TOW          W\ \ \                   --------

 *  \(                               )/  *                    ||  ||

      \_                           _//                        nn  nn

  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~          Cow after learning that

                                                     the vice president has a

(__)     (__)         (__) (__)                      lower IQ than he does

(oo)  +  (oo)      =  (oo) (oo)

 \/       \/           \/   \/                                  (__,

                                                                (+o)

(__)     (__)(__)     (__) (__) (__)                 /-----#-----\'

(oo)  +  (oo)(oo)  =  (oo) (oo) (oo)                / | Cownucks||  \

 \/       \/  \/       \/   \/   \/                   }}--------}}   \ o

                                                      ==        ==    --

           Cownting...                             This cow plays hockey



                                                             /.

                                                       moo  /`'\  .

             (__)   MOO!                                 ` /    ./ \..

             (oo)  /                                    ../   .'      \.

      /-------\/                                     ../    /    ../    \

     / |     ||                                    ./     ./   ./        \

    *  ||----||                                  ./     ./            \   \.

-------~~----~~-----                         .../    ../       ../          \

                    \                       /       /         /

                          Ech-cow   (echo)



                 ________________                 (__)

         ~__~   /                \                (--)s ---mmmmoooooooOOOOOO!

         (oo)  ( Milk is logical. )             __ \O//

  /-------\/ --'\________________/             /   ==s)\_____

 / |     ||                                *--/|_/-----/    OO       COW

*  ||W---||                                    |__       __ II     JOYRIDES

   ~~    ~~                         O O o  o   /  \-----/  \

Mr Spock's cow                                 \__/     \__/



      *             .                 .    ,

           .           .     *        .      .

                     .                                 *

          \   /         ,        (__)   ,       ,

        -   *   -                (       .      |

      .   /   \     ,       .     \/     .        -   -    .

         .                       / \\        ,      |

        ,      *         *      /   /\\

                   .           /\\ /       .           .

          *           .       /   \\             .         .

    _|_    ,   .    ,        /           ,      *

     |  .     ,       .     *        , .           .

       .    ,     .         .            .  *          .



                           The Milky Way





                      \  /         ________________________________

                       \/         /                                \

               (__)    /\         |    At times likes these you    |

               (oo)   O  O        | REALLY CoVet a proper surgeon! |

               _\/_   //        O \________________________________/

         *    (    ) //       O

          \  (\\    //       o

           \(  \\    )      o                                   (__)

            (   \\   )   /\                                     (oo)

  ___[\______/~~~~~~~\__/) o-)__                                /\/\

 |\__[=======______//________)__\                      Cocown  (\==/)

 \|_______________//____________|                               \<>/

     |||      || //||     |||

     |||      || @.||     |||                            (___)      /~~~~~\

      ||      \/  .\/      ||                            /- -\     /  MU  /

                 . .                                    (  ~  ) __/______/

                '.'.`                                    \_O_/

             COW-OPERATION                             Buddha's Cow





   (_                 ~         -       _)             /       ~

          (           -                        -               |  =s

O                               |            *

                  |           O        \      \       -  |

             |                                   \               |

        -                    -                |



)

       Cow after one too many Pan-Galactic Gargle Blasters.



                                      (__)                ---_

(__) _______________*                 (oo)               /|   \

(xx)-\           \             /-------\/               / |\   \_ (__)

 \/ /-\___________\--\        / |     |                *  ||\     (oo)

                             *  ------                    ~~ \____ \/

       Boneless Cow      No leg cow (ground beef)    Two leg cow (lean beef)



                                 (__)

                                 (oo)

                                  \/                             \___/

                           /     / \\                            (0 0)

                                /   /\\                           \ /

                               /\\ /                               v

                    /         /   \\                               |

                             /                             <-------|------->

                       /    *                                      |

                 |\                                                |

           /     |  \         /                                  __|__

                 \\   \                                          \/ \/

           /       \\   \                                        \/ \/

      /              \\___\                                      \/ \/

            /          \\                                        __|__

               /      \\                                         \   /

 /    /           /        \\                                    |\ /|

            /                \\                                  | V |

        /         /            \\                                |   |

              /                  \\                              |   |

                   /               \\                            W   W

                                     \\

       ===============================O===========        Stick Cow sunbathing

       ===========================================        at Malibu wearing a

        O)                                      O)        special cow bikini.

                   The dreaded cowtapult



    (__)                                (___)            **       ((__))

    (__)               (__)             (___)             \\      ((oo))

    (oo)               (  )             (   )              \\------\\//

   | \/ |             (  /*)            |   |               ||      ||

   |  |             ||  ||            |   |               |||----|||

                                  (___)               ~~~    ~~~

Cows doin' it      Cows doin' it           \_*             Cow during an

 FRONT VIEW          BACK VIEW         TOP VIEW             Earthquake



          ((     _  _                       (___)              (__)

         ( D\   (_)(_)____                  (0 0)              (oo)

   _______\__| | MOOTV____(          /-------\_O---moo        *-\/-------\

  /|     ||   _/\____/              / |     ||               /  ||      |  \

 / ||____| \/~   /  \              *  ||,---||              *   ||-----||   *

*  ||    |      O    O                ~~    ~~               \/|(/)(/\(,,/

   ~~    ~                         Romie mooed...          while Julie ate.

     "Moo-vie ela







      (       )

       \     /

        (0 0)

        \ & /

         (-)





                    (__) 

   | X |    `\------(oo) 

   | X |    * ||    (__) 

   | X |    * ||w--||    







                 (__)                  (__)

                 (oo)     (__)         (oo)    (__)

                  \/-(__)-(oo)          \(__)--(oo)

                   /-(oo)--\/           /(oo)---\/\

              /-------\/  ||*     /-------\/   ||| *

             / |     ||---||     / |     ||----||^

            *  ||----||   ^^    *  ||----||    ^^

               ^^    ^^            ^^    ^^

                      --Ooya            --Ooya







         (__)

         (oo)

  /-------\/

 / |     ||

*  ||----||

   ~~    ~~

     Cow





         O__O                             \_|_/

         (oo)                             (oo)

  /-------\/                       /-------\/

 / |     ||                       / |     ||

*  ||----||                      *  ||----||

   ~~    ~~                         ~~    ~~

Cow at Disneyland       Cow visiting the Statue of Liberty





                        (__)

                ~~      (oo)

            ~~~~ /-------\/

         ~~~~~  / |     ||

       ~~~~~   *  ||----||

    ~~~~~~~~  ====~~====~~====

~~~~~~~~/

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

     Cow Hanging Ten at Malibu





               )\               (__)

              /  \              (oo)

        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

           Cow swimming at Amityville

(Where Jaws was filmed, for those less educated)





    *

     \

  \

  |\

\ | \ (__)

\\|| \(oo)

 \||\ \\/

  ~~ \||

   \\ ||

    \\||

     \||

      ~~

        \\_

         \_

Cow skiing a Black Diamond at Aspen





       \ (__)

       \\(oo)

  /-----\\\/

 / |    (##)

*  ||----||"

   ~~    ~~

This cow plays bagpipes.





[Devon got the next three from eric@snark.UUCP (Eric S. Raymond)]

         (__)                     (__)                     (__)

         (\/)                     ($$)                     (**)

  /-------\/               /-------\/               /-------\/

 / | 666 ||               / |=====||               / |     ||

*  ||----||              *  ||----||              *  ||----||

   ~~    ~~                 ~~    ~~                 ~~    ~~

Satanic cow           This cow is a Yuppie         Cow in love





[Devon got this one from ihnp4!decvax!savax!sii!siia!kgg (Kenneth G. Goutal)]

         ____

        (____)



         (__)

         (oo)

  /-------\/

 / |     ||

*  ||----||

   ~~    ~~

   holy cow





____

>From: emcecabe@iastate.edu (Bryan L Mccabe)

[Here are a few more.]





         o  o

         |__|             (__)             (__)

         (oo)             (oo)            =(oo)=         oo

  /-------\/       /-------vv       /-------\/

 / |     ||       / |     ||       / |     ||

*  ||----||      *  ||----||      *  ||----||

   ~~    ~~         ~~    ~~         ~~    ~~

 bill bixby        bela lugosi      boris karloff  claude rains

 male relative     cow              cow            cow

 cow





                                            (___)

       \^^^^^^^^\   (__)                    (o o)

        \^^^^^^^^\\ (oo)                     \ /

     *-----\_______\/\/                    \--O--/

   ^_______/   ---  \______^              // -----\

  ^--------\   \S/  /\_____^              \\/_^{} /==V===[]

            \______/                        \_____\\//

                                             \__/

It's a bird...                               //\\         The Boss

 It's a plane...                             //  \\   (Bruce Holstien)

                                             //   //

                                             ^^    ^^





                     (__)

                     (oo)

  /-------------------\/

 / |                 ||

*  ||----------------||

   ^^                ^^

Stretch Cow





                 /~~~~\   /~~~~\    

                 \    /   \    /    

                  |  |_____|  |     

                /~             ~\             

       /~~~~~-_|  /~~\    /~~~\  |_-~~~~~\    

       \ ==== /| |   O|  |   ^ | |\ ==== /    

        ~-__-~ | |_---+--+----_| | ~-__-~     

               |/~             ~\|          

               /                 \       

              (      O      O     )      

               `\              ./'    

                 ~-__________-~|    

                 |   |\__/|    |

                 |   |/~~\|    |    

                 | /~~~~~~~~~\ |    

                 | |         | |    

                 | |         | |    

                 | |         | |    

                 | |         | |











   .:'                                  `:.

  ::'                                    `::

 :: :.                                  .: ::

  `:. `:.             .             .:'  .:'

   `::. `::           !           ::' .::'

       `::.`::.    .' ! `.    .::'.::'

         `:.  `::::'':!:``::::'   ::'

         :'*:::.  .:' ! `:.  .:::*`:

        :: HHH::.   ` ! '   .::HHH ::

       ::: `H TH::.  `!'  .::HT H' :::

       ::..  `THHH:`:   :':HHHT'  ..::

       `::      `T: `. .' :T'      ::'

         `:. .   :         :   . .:'

           `::'               `::'

             :'  .`.  .  .'.  `:

             :' ::.       .:: `:

             :' `:::     :::' `:

              `.  ``     ''  .'

               :`...........':

               ` :`.     .': '

                `:  `"""'  :'




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